Wednesday, December 9, 2009


You will never guess what I did.

I signed up for Tae Kwon Do.

Well, I was tricked into signing up for Tae Kwon Do.

Let me back up a little bit.

My five year old son has been dying to take Tae Kwon Do ever since he found out that his best friend at preschool was taking it. I finally got around to signing him up for it a couple of weeks ago.

There was a special where you got your first four lessons and a do-bok (that is how you say little white outfit in Korean) for $79. It isn't cheap, but he was all about it and my husband and I both thought he would get a lot out of it especially in the area of body control.

You know how little boys are always running in to things.

After two lessons (which he adored) his twin sister decided that she might like it too. So I signed her up.

Last Tuesday I took them in for his fourth lesson and her second lesson. Before the class even started I was whisked in to the office where the Master sat - not one of the underling masters but The Master, the main man, the guy that owns the joint.

It was time for the hard sell.

I don't have the exact figures but signing the two of them up for a year came to somewhere around one million dollars.

Okay, it was significantly less than one million but also significantly more than I had in my bank account. In fact, thinking about it makes me want to vomit, but I know it was the right thing to do. Both children love it, it is marvelous exercise and a lot of their friends from school are in there.

Then The Master says to me "What about you?"

I am thinking: There is no fucking way. There are like four other adults here in the kids classes and they all look like gigantic tool bags. The last thing I need to do is spend another $800 to look like an asshole.

My subconscious has a filthy mouth.

I am saying "No. I really can't afford it."

Then The Master drop the bomb. "I will give you one year for free if you take the class with the children. It helps them learn at home and stay involved."

Oh Shit. I think. How can I turn down a year of free Tae Kwon Do? This would actually give me something to write about on Loser Moms.

The Master said that he would give me the free year, but I actually had to show up. If I didn't actually take the classes he was going to charge me.

So I said yes.

But I was scared.

Really. I didn't want to do it. My kids were through the roof excited, but I was very apprehensive.

I didn't want to look like an idiot.

What if I sucked at it?

What if it was hard?

What if all of the five year old were better than me?

But I had committed to this.

So yesterday I had my first lesson. It was awkward. I had no idea what the lady was saying. Some other parents I knew were there watching their children. But when we broke up in to groups I knew everybody in my group. It was me, Ian (5), Claudia (5), Paige (5) and Emma (6).

I think I probably did look like a tool, but it was kind of fun.

And I wasn't too bad at it.

And Emma's mom was really nice about it. She gave me a thumbs up and everything.

So yeah.

Goon Squad Sarah do-bok

My name is Sarah and I am a white belt in Tae Kwon Do.


Cross-Posted on Sarah and the Goon Squad


Goddess in Progress said...

I'm sorry, but that is fricking awesome. Shame, kids, and money. He's got the guilt/pressure trifecta.

Good luck!

mylfieasitis said...

Good for you and the kids! But if I'd known you wanted to do TKD I'd have given you a month pass (free) at my studio!!!

Amelia Sprout said...

That is a brilliant salesman, but I think you'll have a great time.

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